THE SADNESS OF WISDOM AND MATURITY

This is a true love story written by a guy and the love he has for his dogs.
The guy is my oldest son and the doggies are my grand-doggies. Grab your tissues.


Back in 1999 I was blessed to have a 7 week old yellow lab come into my life. I wanted to name him Beau, but realized that it rhymed with "no" so I chose another name. Because he was yellow like sunshine, and also because he was my son I named him Sunny. At first the spelling was "Sonny" and that was how everyone knew him. He was young and boxy headed, he looked like a puppy on a calender. I never thought about all the tomorrows. I lived in the day with him and we came to be best friends. I never strayed far from home because I could never trust that anyone else would treat him with them love and devotion that I did. But I was young and impatient. I angered so easily when he showed his stubborn side. Still though, I loved him as much as my heart could love anything.

Six months later another dog came into my life. She was a small emaciated black dog with a curious mix: chow and lab. She got the best qualities of both breeds. I fell in love with her from the start, and she and Sonny became like brother and sister. They were my children. I named her" Daisy May" because she made me smile the smell of a daisy on a warm spring day. She went everywhere that I went and would sit between my feet for hours accepting love and affection and giving adoration in return. But again I was young and impatient. I angered when she was stubborn and the more angry I became the more stubborn she became. How ironic it was that she and I were so alike. It came to a contest of wills and I thought that I had won, but I often wondered at what price. I often regret how angry I became in those days. It saddens me to know that at times she feared me. Like Sonny, she was my true best friend and I loved her as much as my heart could muster.

They were so young and so strong. Their energy was something hard to comprehend. They were keen to see and smell, sleek and graceful. They were like perfection made into a physical form. The days were long... there was no question that they would last forever. No idea, no thought. What a fool I was.

Now the days are short. They sit beside me after 11 years. 11 years that have been filled with a kind of love that most people never know. 11 horribly short and mortal years. They are old and their eyes have turned green from the film that covers them with age, robbing them of the once keen eyesight they both had. They wimper from pain while they sleep and their faces have become frosted with white. Their eyes are sunken and watery. They move slowly but when I come home their tails wag like they did when they where young. When I pray I beg the Lord for more time. Each morning I shake them to make sure they are still with me. I wake in the night scared because they are not in the room and I get up and walk the house looking for them. When I find them we lay together and talk. I kiss them and stroke them and tell them what good children they are and that they are my best friends. Then I go to bed and fall into an uneasy sleep. When I leave the house I tell them each how much I love them and as I drive away I pray again. I beg for more time.

I have made all the arrangements for them to be in a peaceful place after time claims them from me. I will place angels above them and they will rest sound with their toys, next to each other... close enough to hear each other and not be scared. My children, my best friends. I will honor them for all the days that I have left for the friendship and love, the times they were there for me when no one else was. And when they leave, a great part of me, some of the best that I am will leave with them.

Today we sat in the yard and played fetch. Daisy did the things she'd always done and I remembered how her aggressiveness would make me angry when I was younger, when they where younger. I smiled this time and thought about how I have grown, how I've learned the sad secret: tomorrow is not promised to us. love all you can and give everything you can today. Celebrate this moment because soon these moments will be taken from you.

The thing that is painful in life is that we learn to appreciate love and friendship too late in life. By the time we settle down and accept our loved ones for who they are our days together have grown short. Each day we have together is the most special day of our lives. The next hour is the most special.

Lance Wendling